Friday, February 5, 2016

Storytelling for Week 3: Beginning of a New Beginning



“Mr. Hanoo- , Haanu-, Hennew-…”

“Just call me H,” Hanuman interrupted.

Clearing her throat and without taking a breath she said, “The doctor will see you now. After your session, you will return to this desk and I will help set up your next appointment. His office is two doors to your right at the end of that hall, room 418.”

Looking puzzled, Hanuman decided not to trouble the receptionist any longer to repeat the directions and proceeded on his way to the room. After roaming around for a while, he finally found the room. He noticed that the door was slightly open, but to the point where he could easily slip in. Hesitating, he decided to politely knock on the glass window of the door instead.

The doctor replied, “Come, come!”

Hanuman entered the room and immediately noticed the decorations that surrounded him. Nothing but monkeys. Differently dressed monkeys here and there. The thing that gave him a chuckle were the bookends. The ends were monkeys who looked like they were pushing against the books with all their might.

The therapist quickly noticed his chuckle. “Find something funny?”

Hanuman had not realized his chuckle was out loud rather than to himself. He responded hastily, “No, nothing at all.”

“Please have a seat. Anything to drink?” asked the therapist.

“No thank you,” he replied. As Hanuman slowly sat down, his mind began to wander.

“Have something in mind?” inquired the therapist.

Hanuman was still in a daze. The therapist repeated himself. Coming back to reality, Hanuman apologized and the therapist nodded and asked again.

“I don’t know really. This is why I decided to meet with you. I need to see if you could help me understand why I drift off so much,” said Hanuman worriedly.

“Why don’t we start with the beginning? Tell me how you’ve been feeling the past few days, months, or even year if you can stretch that far?” the therapist asked.

Hanuman froze and watched as the rain started to pour down and hit the window ever so lightly that it started to sound like a melody. He realized that the therapist was still waiting for an answer. He quickly replied, “Gloomy...”. He noticed that the therapist did not have any utensils to write anything down, so he paused.

“Continue.”

“…and lost, I guess? I can’t really put my finger on it but whenever I see something that may be related to why I feel this way, I zone off into my own world. At least, that is what I use as an excuse,” he finished.

“So let’s start with talking about the feeling of gloomy. Was there a certain association with that term? Does something or someone remind you of that feeling?” questioned the therapist.

“The rain. I remember long ago there was this city that always had monsoon seasons continuously throughout the year. I remember having some kind of tension whilst being there and so maybe that’s why the rain tenses me up badly,” he asserted.

“Hmm. Interesting. Okay, can you reach back and pull any more memories during that time?” asked the therapist.

“That’s what I’ve been trying to work on. So far I only remember three terms. Loyalty, suffering and love. I also want to mention that between these three terms, one of them relates to a certain rage I hold whenever deeply thinking about them. So I want to request that we don’t dig further into them,” he pleaded.

“I understand your concern but in order to help with your current situation, we need to acknowledge the possible factors that may have a relationship to it. We can slowly sidle into them if it helps...” he reassured Hanuman. “Let’s start with love? Is there someone out there who you love? Mother, sister, and or significant other?” suggested the therapist.

“Anjana,” he vaguely stated. “I love her with all my heart. After all, she is the woman who raised me.” Thunder clapping catching his attention, he looked back out at the rain again. “But there was this one girl…” Having lost his focus, he watched as a drop of rain steadily made its way down the window. He intensely looked at the line it created. He jumped up with concern. “LOOK! She’s right there! Can you see her?” he asked in a panicked tone.
Rain streaking down. Source.


The therapist requested that he take his seat. Instead, Hanuman ran over to the window. Unknowingly, he knocked down a few porcelain monkeys and traced the line of the rain with his finger. The therapist raised his tone at this point, to get his attention. Again, he repeatedly requested Hanuman to take his seat. Hanuman frantically covered his ears and started yelling back at the therapist to get rid of the monkeys. The therapist quickly realized the situation and in a cooler tone recommended that Hanuman better take his seat or he could walk out the door.



To be continued...


Author's note:

Yes, I apologize for cutting it off so soon but I wanted to build up intensity for Hanuman's side of the story. In this version, I am more focused on the future Hanuman by showcasing his immortality. As a normal guy walking around with the common folks, without the appearance of a monkey or ape-like characteristics. He seeks therapeutic help in order to understand more of the traumatic past he had but cannot remember. Therapy is a way to let the characters explain how they feel instead of the reader interpreting their actions and basing their feelings through that. I also combined different stories to make Hanuman to be "the one who got away" type of guy. Hanuman is remembered as a loyal devotee of Rama as we all know, but I wanted to create a mysterious side of him that still needs to be revealed. I added plenty of detail because I saw how in the recent stories of Ramayana, detail is key. Everyone and anyone would be able to imagine the story better if there were more detailed. In the future I plan on continuing this passage so I don't leave anyone hanging. More of the story is continued in the Storytelling for Week 4



Bibliography:

Public Domain Ramayana: Table of Contents

46. Rainy Season: The first verse portion comes from Ramayana, The Epic of Rama, Prince of India, condensed into English verse by Romesh Dutt (1899), and the second verse portion comes from Relatives by Arthur William Ryder (1919)
50. Hanuman's Leap : Myths of the Hindus and Buddhists by Sister Nivedita (1914).
54. Hanuman and Sita :The prose portion comes from Indian Myth and Legend by Donald A. Mackenzie (1913), and the verse portion comes from Ramayana, The Epic of Rama, Prince of India, condensed into English verse by Romesh Dutt (1899).






9 comments:

  1. Benika,

    My assigned blog commenting group and I also wrote all of our weekly storytelling assignments about Hanuman. He seems to be a very popular character with our Indian Epics class. I thought your writing was great, you gave just enough hints and details to make me want to come back for more next week. I look forward to it.

    Andrew

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  2. Benika,

    I loved your story! You definitely have a talent for writing. I enjoyed the unique setting and dialogue along with little bits of comedy here and there. It really made it an enjoyable little story to read. Your descriptive words really helped paint a picture for the scenes you were trying to portray. I find that, for me as well, using descriptive words helps the reader know exactly what we as authors want to reflect about certain characters and their feelings. As for formatting, I think the font size and font style was great. I could read everything clearly and easily. The picture you chose was great. It set the mood and reflected what you were trying to say in the story. The only advice I would give is maybe putting it closer in the paragraph to where you mention rain, so that the reader can get the full effect of everything. Overall, it was a great story and can’t wait to read more of it!

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  3. HI Benika,

    I was not expecting a cliff hanger! You are a very talented writer. I was hooked from the beginning and instantly wanted to read more once I got to the end. I am so happy that you seem like you will make this into multiple stories. Not to mention, you chose the perfect pictures for this story! They really enhanced the images I had in my head while reading. Great job!

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  4. Benika, I enjoyed reading your work. I like how you brought it into present times. Your vivid imagery helped me visualize the setting very quickly. This is a small detail, but I loved how the receptionist couldn't pronounce his name. It helped make it more familiar. I definitely was confused when seeing his name at first. It was smart of you to keep the name the same. I also loved that you used a cliff hanger. I enjoy cliff hangers because you didn't rush to end the story. You did a great job with the dialogue. You kept it interesting and I could follow along. I was never confused as to who was speaking or what they were speaking about.

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  5. Hello Benika!

    I have to first start by complimenting your blog, it is so user-friendly and the colors are so beautiful! I am a big fan.
    I also think that your writing style is great! I love that you implemented humor in the beginning with the receptionist being unable to say Hanuman's name and then when he laughed to himself, too loudly, at the monkey book ends.
    The story also had a serious twist to it, which I think is great because it adds depth. I think that the fact that Hanuman feels gloomy is sad but it makes him very relatable and "normal" - if you will.
    I also think that although your story is relatively long, the dialogue that you implemented throughout, with the receptionist and then with the therapist, helped to break the story apart and made it a really easy and enjoyable read.

    I also really liked that you added a cliff hanger and I am eager to read more! Great job!

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  6. Hi Benika,

    I love the cliffhanger -- it looks like this is a story topic you'll return to, so it will be interesting to revisit your portfolio and see what's been added! The therapy frame seems popular in storytelling for our class this semester. I wonder if it's because we all question the psychological effects these epics' intense storylines must have on their characters?

    I noticed several places where there were punctuation errors, like run-on sentences that needed commas or other places where there were periods instead of commas, and others where tense use switched between past and present. Some things to maybe address in later writing assignments.

    I don't think I like this therapist very much. It's interesting how the unhelpful/disinterested therapist figure is the one frequently used in the stories I've read; rarely does he or she seem to actually care about the patient. I hope Hanuman didn't break any of the weird monkey figurines when he knocked them over.

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  7. Hello Benika. The setting that you have chosen for your story really sets it apart from some of the other storytelling posts that I have read in this class. Reducing a powerful mythological creature to that of a mentally disturbed patient is definitely a unique way to deliver your tone.
    I liked that you included scenes in the story in which Hanuman falls into a trance-like state at times before being brought back to reality by the therapist. It communicates the troubled character with detail that allows the reader to visualize the story more accurately. I wonder if you plan on including more characters as patients or maybe even therapists in your future installments. Taking a modern day approach to the lives of historical icons can lead to incredibly entertaining stories whether it be a comedy or tragic drama. I look forward to reading more of your work with the next story.

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  8. Hi Benika,

    I decided to read your story this week because I like Hanuman. He was a great character in the original Ramayana readings. When I read the introduction I couldn't imagine why he would need counseling. After a couple of paragraphs, It is clear that Hanuman has experienced something unsettling in his life. The therapist seemed cold and uncaring, not a good attribute of a physician. I thought it was ingenious to write this along the lines of a "mini series." I will definitely revisit your blog before the end of the semester to see how this turns out.

    The picture you chose was very appropriate. It added to the text as I was reading about Hanuman running to the window and tracing the rain with his fingers. Your sentence structure was good and you got right to the point. The author’s note was very descriptive and detailed. Good job and have a good rest of the semester!

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  9. Hi Benika,

    I cannot believe this is the first time getting to your project. I have noticed that a lot of people have focused on Hanuman, but that is no surprise since he is such an interesting character. I like that you used a therapy session to show the torment that is haunting Hanuman. I was wondering why you chose to have Hanuman not be able to remember his past? Was it because he blocked those traumatic memories out? My favorite part of your story was when Hanuman said he saw Anjana and went wild. You made a great choice to leave us with a cliff hanger, because now I want to know if he really saw Anjana, or maybe he was just hallucinating. I thought it was pretty cold of the therapist to give Hanuman an ultimatum of calming down or leaving. Hanuman seems to be in a great deal of pain and you would expect a therapist to show more sympathy to that fact. I also really like that you provided a link to the continuation of the story in your author’s note. Smart move.

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